Part I - the return of the Duct Tape
Remember back to March/April when I played that joke on my German class and put them all in a seating assignment based on their hair color? Yeah they laughed and laughed and wanted to get me back. But I've got some wicked "Nun chuck" teaching skills by this point. So getting me back was going to be tough. But they did. This whole experience is going to take longer to type than happened in real life. Here goes....
It was a beautiful day in May around 1:30 p.m. German I was about to start and I was going to be late starting it. A student out in the hall had an URGENT question about music yada yada. By the time I headed to the German class I was about 1 min 1/2 late.
I entered the class room eager to make up for lost time. Everything looked normal at first except the lights were off. I flipped on the lights and started to say "Guten Ta.......................!?!??." but I never finished.
In the middle of the classroom sitting in my chair was Uwe. He was duct taped to my chair. Duct taped! His hands and feet were bound and he had a strip of duct tape across his mouth. In addition to how alarming this already looked, Uwe was putting on an Emmey award winning performance. His eyes were rolling around in his head as his body thrashed back and forth under the constrains of the duct tape. It looked like a torture scene from 24.
Yes this is the Uwe (names still changed) of past duct tape fame. One could really say the Uwe struck again. This is not okay. This is wrong on so many levels. I am in control of my classroom. Right Right?!? No. Uwe was in control and I had to do something fast! But as I walked over to Uwe I had to use every ounce of mean teacher strength not to laugh.
The whole class was rolling with laughter. I stood over Uwe not knowing where to start. His hands were taped. His feet were taped. His mouth was taped. He was putting on a pretty good show of pretending to talk through the duct tape. I ripped (gently pulled) the duct tape off and said in my meanest pretend voice: "Who did this to you?" Uwe realizing I wasn't mad just whimpered.
"How am I going to get this off?" I asked aloud. Some quiet girl in the back called out
"I've got a knife."
Great that is just what this scene needs. A knife. She hands me a slightly sharper than a butter knife and I cut the bindings off. I sent Uwe back to his seat. He did a army roll across the classroom and then came up underneath his desk. By that time I was laughing like crazy. Uwe was laughing. The whole class was laughing. Then because I am a good teacher I had to kill the mood with a lecture on appropriate situations for school. We discussed and decided that this did not qualify as one.
So they were even. They got me back for the blond to brown seating assignment. Until the next day when I got them AGAIN!
Part II - the teacher strikes again.
German II ended and the same German I class was about to start. I had had the lights out in German II and when they left I kept them off. I sat in my chair in the front of the class. The very chair Uwe had duct taped himself too (with a little help from his friends) I curled up in this chair (it is big and throne like) and pretended to be asleep.
It was so awesome. The first ones started talking until they realized I was "sleeping" then I heard muffled conversations like: "Shh she is asleep" don't wake her up. and "Is she really asleep?" the response: "she's totally asleep look at her breathing." Ha Ha Ha I'm a pretty good asleep faker.
I let it go on about a minute after class had started. Then I jumped up and yelled "I'M AWAKE!"
You should have seen their faces. It was priceless. The year ended pretty uneventfully after that. They turned in their final assignments and passed their oral exams. I have this same group of kids next year for German II. I have a feeling that Uwe and the duct tape will strike again.