Monday, March 17, 2008

The gang

At first glance this seems like a group of normal people enjoying an evening but at second glance I think all of my readers will realize that Yes, Yes indeed, this is a gathering of mafia hit men and women. This pack under the direction of Big Pappy Jimmy has been causing terror in various parts of the world for years. Names have been changed as part of the internet protection program.

Big Pappy Jimmy sits in his lush pleather arm chair with his long polyester sleeves covering a slew of tattoos none of which are innocent enough to say "mother." Many myths surround Big Pappy but almost everyone is certain that he tattoo's the names of each of his victims on his right hip bone.

Meg the aloof (Yellow sweater beaded necklace) is Jimmy's right hand woman. Don't let the blond hair fool you. This woman is no Suzanne Summers. She speaks several languages and is working under cover right now in the D.C. Public school systems buying and selling narcotics, 3 minute zum nackdenken packets and expensive hair products to America's Youth.

Traci the terminator works as a team with Christian the "Killing Kind" Underneath her Argyle sweater is a bullet proof vest she never leaves home with out. Beware those who cross her path. In her spare time she likes grows an herb garden and makes grape juice.

Her husband Christian the "Killing Kind" is sometimes seen sporting a handle bar mustache. The most mysterious of the pack after Big Pappy, the "Killing Kind" is known to take it personally any time "bonsai" tree is incorrectly pronounced.

Heinz "the smiling fool" just found out that he was actually going to replace Meg the aloof as as Jimmy's right hand man. In the picture after this (not shown) Heinz slips into Meg's tight yellow sweater and beaded necklace.

...and me "sausage lost" the name may seem mysterious. It involves our last job securing and then misplacing 1 lb. of expensive Italian sausage at a coffee shop in the metro area. Don't worry, we lost the meat but our identities were not compromised. Until next time...


Arwen said...

Sometimes I worry about you Joanie. Oh well, you'll have to excuse me, Igor has arrived with a fresh corpse.

Jake said...

Joanie - I am SO STOKED that you and Meg are moving to Leipsch! We should all make an appointment with Herr Schwalbe to make the moment complete. And BTW, Jim's awesome beard puts my attempt to shame.

jenny cannon said...

Joan so good to hear from you and to see pics of you and your handsome husband. Looks like you guys are very happy. I am excited to keep up with you and your fabulous life. By the way you are gorgeous. you guys are still in UT right?

footballcrucible said...

I know who I'll kill next.

Callie and Grant Lippard said...

Hey you gang, you forgot the most important, ever-present yet conveniently-excluded-from-the-bloody-picture (an apologetic shout out to our beloved ehemalige englisch elders) "undercover" international man of mystery who dresses to kill, has looks to die for, and a license to do the same...kill that is. Just when i convinced you that i was in fact NOT in the picture, take another good look behind the plush leather arm chair and Big Pappy's cleverly distracting smile. btw, check out my blog too (d.h. my wife's blog about me ;) Joan, when are we going to get everyone together to go to Moab?