THE LIFE OF THE RIDDLE

THE LIFE OF THE RIDDLE

Saturday, September 13, 2008

My husband drilled a hole in my finger.

A few weeks ago I was closing my trunk with my left hand. Unfortunately for me the middle finger of my right hand was still in my trunk when I closed it.
"AHHHH" I screamed in pain. I panicked. I tried to pull it out. I pulled and pulled but my finger was stuck and the trunk had locked.

I looked around for someone willing to help the damsel in distress. I was alone. I pulled my finger again and it didn't budge. The pain was excruciating. I used my left hand to fish around in my purse for my keys. This was not easy but finally I managed to open the trunk and pull my finger out.

Immediately a big red spot of blood began filling up under the nail where the trunk had pinned it. By the end of the night the entire nail was a silvery black color.

Anytime I bumped it or moved it pain shot throughout my entire arm. I had no idea that a little fingernail could be so painful. I couldn't sleep so finally after 2 days I called my Dad who is a physician he said, "You didn't puncture the nail to relieve the pressure?"
"huh? Am I supposed to?" is this common knowledge. My dad then preceded to tell Spencer how to puncture my fingernail to relieve the pressure. My dad explained that you should get a needle and heat it on the stove. Spencer didn't look at all excited to operate until my dad said the word "Drill." Suddenly Spencer had a light in his eyes. "Yeah I've got a drill." A what? did my Dad tell Spencer to use his drill? On my finger?!? I was only listening to one side of the conversation. "Spencer still rambled on with my dad. Yeah drill bit, yeah okay got it.


apparently my dad felt that a drill bit would penetrate the nail easier.
The operating scene.Spencer changed into a different shirt to do the drilling. This shirt had a monkey with two bandaged arms and a chain saw and tag line that read "Don't juggle chainsaws." Yeah it gave me lots of confidence.


I was freaked out of my mind. The pain was so intense that I was agreeing to go along with the drill my finger thing, but naturally I was afraid that Spencer would drill too far and nail my finger to the kitchen table.
We cleaned everything with rubbing alcohol.
On the count of 3 Spencer was going to drill into the finger like planned. We counted to 3 several times which always resulted in my pulling my arm back before Spencer could do it. This continued for a half an hour. I realize that I am very dramatic but I think anyone would have done the same.
Finally I let him drill. The whole thing took a tenth of a second. Spencer pressed the drill bit lightly into my finger nail and soon blood was squirting out like a geyser. Immediately it felt better. So much better that I sat and squeezed blood out the hole and played with the skin and took all of these gruesome pictures.


After he drill my finger looked like this. Do you see the perfect hole his drill created?
A week later some of the blood came back my finger looked like this.
Finally the nail fell off and now it looks like this. People always ask me what happened. I'm tempted to tell them that I flipped someone off and God smote my finger but I don't. I slammed it in a car door. Then everyone precedes to tell me when the lost their finger nails. I just want it to grow back before my next birthday. Thanks for reading.

11 comments:

The UnMighty said...

So, was this the first time Spencer drilled you?

(tee-he he)

Give Mease a chance said...

greusome!
ps why doesn't blogger have a spell check for comments? I don't know if that is how greusome is spelled it almost prohibits me from leaving a comment.

Evenstar said...

Oh yuck! At least your nail is growing back, I told you it would!

Sugarsmax said...

I think this has to be rated R for blood and gore.

Kevin & Chelsey Christensen said...

Gross!

Kate said...

Joanie didn't you say that Spencer was more nervous than you! He even bought you ice cream which he ended up eating.

Karlie Lundell said...

OUCH!! You are one brave girl! It looks horrible! Just thinking about it, makes me sick, let alone the pictures. I'm glad it's better now.

The Kyles said...

horrifying and fascinating at the same time.

footballcrucible said...

I'll perform minor surgery on anyone.

Ben and Missy said...

Those are awesome pictures. I don't think I could have done that.

Melissa Bowman said...

I did this "procedure" on my Dad once. I used a sterilized nail like in one of your Dad's suggestions. It was very interesting to do. I'm glad your nail is getting better!